It’s a photo of my son and his beautiful bride, my husband and me, as well as my parents and stepparents. A few years ago I probably would have only looked at my son and his beautiful bride. This time when I saw it, my eyes went straight to both sets of my parents. Both my parents and one of my stepparents are now in their 80s. Watching them has made me think differently about my own future. It made me realize how easy it is to assume our future will somehow take care of itself. Yes, genetics play a role. But so do the choices we make every day. For me, that’s what creating your next chapter is really about. It isn’t about predicting the future. It’s about making the kinds of choices today that give that future the best chance of becoming reality. It’s asking, “What kind of life do I want to be living 10, 20 or 30 years from now?” And “Who do I want to be when that future arrives?” That doesn’t just apply to our health. It applies to our relationships, our finances and how we spend our time. What’s one choice you’re making today that your future self will thank you for?

Ray Dalio talks about the importance of gaining perspective in Principles. One of the ideas that stuck with me is that when you zoom out over time, most things become smaller and less important. It had struck me on this particular morning when I looked up at the sky. A rocket launch. The moon. A tiny streak of light moving through something much bigger. The things that consume us today often feel enormous because we’re standing too close to them. The difficult conversation. The uncertainty. The decision we don’t want to make. The fear that we’re behind or that we’ve somehow missed our opportunity. But life has a way of changing size when we change perspective. What feels overwhelming today may become one of the smallest parts of your story when you look back a year from now. Sometimes the most important thing we can do isn’t solve the problem immediately. It’s simply to zoom out. Your next chapter isn’t written by the moment you’re standing in. It’s written by the perspective you choose to take as you move forward. What in your life might benefit from stepping back and looking at it from a different perspective?

How do you wake up most mornings? Do you hit the snooze button? Do you jump out of bed excited for the day? Or do you wake up to, “Mom, how do I turn on the stove? I’m making pancakes!” No matter how your morning starts, here’s something I’ve learned. Your morning doesn’t determine your day. Your state does. For years, I woke up on autopilot and lived much of the time in reaction. I think many of us do. We move from one responsibility to the next without stopping to notice how we’re feeling or realizing we have more influence over it than we think. I’ve become aware I have far more influence over how I experience my day than I do over what happens during it. That doesn’t mean every day is perfect. It means I have choices. Movement changes my state. Gratitude changes my state. Prayer changes my state. Learning changes my state. Laughter changes my state. The next time you catch yourself on autopilot or feeling frustrated, discouraged or simply “off,” pause and ask yourself: “What’s one thing I can do in the next five minutes to change my state?” I’d love to know… What did you try, and did it change the direction of your day?

Several years ago, I decided to feed what I called my flabby brain. I became aware I had spent years exercising my body but very little time intentionally exercising my mind. I stopped listening to music while working out and driving my car. Instead, I started listening to podcasts where successful people interviewed others in business, entertainment, politics and personal development, young and old, in all stages and wages alike. Many hosts and their guests talked about books that shaped their lives and I remembered conversations with my dad and my son, Anthony, about audiobooks. That’s when I realized I could get them for free from my local library. I got my card, downloaded the apps and I was off! Looking back, I recognize my life started to change because I took a chance on me. From there, I began to understand that if I had been in that place of limbo, there must be other women who felt that way too. When you begin to believe you’re someone who keeps promises not only to others but also to yourself, other parts of you begin to grow. You become more willing to try. More willing to speak up. More willing to step toward the life you’ve imagined instead of just thinking about it. I think a lot of us reach a point where we realize we haven’t stopped growing because we’re incapable. We’ve simply stopped feeding the part of ourselves that wants to grow. Maybe that’s where you are today. Not stuck. Just ready for something more. What’s one promise to yourself you’ve been meaning to keep?