4d • General discussion
“But aren’t we all a little narcissist?”
I hear this a lot, so let’s talk about it like real people.
Yes — every human has moments of narcissism. We all have times where we:
- want attention
- get defensive
- think we’re right
- put our needs first
- feel insecure and overcompensate
That’s just being human.
But here’s the difference:
Normal narcissism is occasional and repairable. Meaning… you can look back and say, “Yeah, I didn’t handle that well. I’m sorry. ”You can care how your actions affected someone. You can grow.
Harmful narcissistic behavior is a patten. It’s not a bad day. It’s a lifestyle. It’s repeated control, manipulation, guilt, gaslighting, and a total lack of accountability — and you’re always the one paying the emotional price.
So when people say, “Well aren’t we all a little narcissist?”sometimes it’s true…but sometimes it’s used to minimize real abuse.
Because there’s a massive difference between:
“I was selfish in that argument.”
and
“I’ve spent years twisting your reality so I never have to face mine.”
One is human.The other is harmful.
And if you’re healing from narcissistic abuse, you’re not “too sensitive.”You’re not overreacting. You’re recovering from a pattern that trained your nervous system to live in survival mode.
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“But aren’t we all a little narcissist?”
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