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I was 59 when someone finally told me I had ADHD
By then I'd already built a career in IT. Managed large teams. Got a degree. Raised two stepsons. Done twenty years of self-development work. And spent decades quietly convinced I was just a bit less than everyone else. Careless. Forgetful. Clumsy. Too emotional. Too much. Not enough. My family used to joke about how I could manage fifty people at work and still lose my keys every single day. It stung every time. Because what they didn't see was how hard I was working just to look as functional as everyone else seemed to be naturally. Then perimenopause hit — and the mask came off whether I wanted it to or not. When I finally got my diagnosis, I cried. Not just from relief. Grief. Rage.more than Twenty years of "what is wrong with me" suddenly had an answer — and that answer broke me open. The thing nobody warns you about? The diagnosis doesn't fix the shame. That's a whole other journey. It took everything I had to get from that diagnosis to where I am now. Not fixed. Not cured. Just finally — genuinely — at peace with who I am. ADHD is just one of my qualities. Like my short legs and my blue eyes. It doesn't define me. I am not ashamed of it. I coach women who are standing exactly where I was. If that's you — you're in the right place.
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🫠Welcome to the Unmask & Reclaim Community!
You found it. Welcome. If you're here, something brought you to the edge of this door — maybe a diagnosis, maybe a dawning suspicion, maybe sheer exhaustion from decades of trying to be someone your brain was never built to be. Whatever it was — I'm glad you're here. My name is June. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 59. By that point I'd built a career, raised kids, done more self-development courses than I can count, been misdiagnosed with depression and mild bipolar, and spent more years than I want to admit quietly believing I was just a bit less than everyone else. The diagnosis brought relief — and then a grief I wasn't expecting. This community exists because the diagnosis is just the beginning. What comes after it — healing the shame, understanding who you actually are underneath all the years of masking, learning to trust yourself — that's the real work. And it's better done together. Here's what this is: A place to say the actual thing, not the sanitised version · A space where ADHD is not a flaw to overcome but a quality to understand · A community of women who get it because they've lived it Here's what this isn't: · A productivity system · A fix · A place where you have to perform being okay Here's how to get started: Step 1: Head to the Classroom 📚 ------------------------------------------------------------------ That's where you'll find resources on self-esteem, emotional regulation, masking, hormones, and more — all created specifically for women with ADHD. I'm building this out right now alongside my founding member community. You'll see it grow in the weeks and months to come. Stick around and you'll be the first to know as new content drops. See Classroom: https://www.skool.com/warrior-queens-9071/classroom Step 2: Introduce yourself below 👇 ------------------------------------------------------------------ (Be reassured - You don't have to share anything if you don't want to❤️) If you are ready though please drop a comment and share:
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My ADHD Has a Name... Meet Dory. 🐟😂
One of the most unexpectedly healing things I've done since my ADHD diagnosis is to give my ADHD a name. Meet Dory... Yes... that Dory... the absent-minded fish from Finding Nemo. She's the delightfully chaotic roommate living in my ADHD brain. 🐟💙 Even before I knew I had ADHD, she was always my favourite character. Looking back, maybe there was a reason 😄 Sure, Dory forgets everything, gets distracted every five seconds and has the attention span of... ooh look , a jellyfish! 😂 But she's also kind, brave, fiercely loyal, endlessly optimistic, and has some pretty amazing superpowers that save the day (like unexpectedly speaking whale! 🐋) When I started calling my ADHD "Dory," something shifted. Now, instead of thinking, "What's wrong with me?" I catch myself saying, "Ah... Dory's driving today." That tiny shift matters. It sounds simple, but it's powerful. In ADHD coaching this is used to externalise your ADHD helping to separate the condition from your real identity. This powerful tool creates space for compassion instead of shame, and for me, it's turned many frustrating ADHD moments into something I can smile about. It helps me laugh when I lose my phone while it's in my hand. It helps me forgive myself when I walk into a room and immediately forget why. Because I may have ADHD but it is not who I am. I'm the person learning to live alongside Dory... and she's actually pretty lovable. 💙 Now, whenever Dory makes an appearance, I smile instead of spiralling (mostly). She's still wonderfully chaotic... But she's also part of what makes me, me. And just like Dory... ✨ I can be forgetful and intelligent. ✨ Distractible and creative. ✨ Chaotic and deeply caring. ✨ Different and incredibly valuable. Does your ADHD had an alter ego, a movie character, an animal, or even a nickname... What would you call it—and why? 👇 I'd love to hear from you... Let's see who lives inside everyone's brain! I can't wait to meet them!
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My ADHD Has a Name... Meet Dory. 🐟😂
I'm curious what you think...Is mindset work enough?🧠
We talk a lot in the ADHD space about mindset Reframing. Strategies. Cognitive tools. And I use all of those things. They matter. But the question is... are they enough? I'm going to say no. I've come to believe that if we only ever work at the level of thoughts — if we're only ever trying to think our way through what we're feeling — we're missing the layer where a huge amount of healing actually lives. 💛The body 💛The nervous system that learned decades ago that it wasn't safe to slow down. 💛The muscles that still brace before you've even registered a threat. 💛The breath that shortens when you feel like you might be getting it wrong. You can't think your way out of a physiology that's been in survival mode for decades. So — what do you think? Have you found that mindset work alone wasn't enough? What shifted for you when something different came in? (Asking for all of us. 😅)
It's real! Perimenopause makes ADHD harder to hide 💣
It was the change in hormones starting with perimenopause that started unmasking my ADHD. I was more emotional, more disorganized, more exhausted. I found it harder to cope at work, I was bad tempered at home, and carrying more shame than ever as I felt like suddenly I was failing at life completely. If you thought you were falling apart in perimenopause — you weren't imagining it. Here's what actually happens. Estrogen directly supports dopamine production in your brain. And dopamine regulates attention, emotional regulation, working memory, and executive function — the exact things ADHD already makes harder. So when estrogen starts declining, your brain loses one of its key supports. The coping strategies you spend decades building — the ones that let you look functional even when you were white-knuckling it — start failing. Not because you get worse. Because the chemical scaffolding that was quietly propping everything up is being dismantled. A 2025 study found that women with ADHD experience perimenopausal symptoms at nearly double the severity of women without it. And for many of us, it was perimenopause that finally made the ADHD impossible to hide — from ourselves or anyone else. It's not falling apart. It's being unmasked. And now that you know — there is a path forward that doesn't involve trying harder, or managing better, or performing more convincingly. It starts with understanding what was actually happening all along. What do you think? How did the start of menopause affect you and how did you feel?
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