Oops i did it again.... · Syncretism Academy

Oops i did it again....

Was walking down my local town street today and came across 2 older men with pamphlets and boards of info. I knew immediately and with 100% certainty it was a Christian religious denomination trying to drum up members. Jehovah's Witnesses to be precise in the end.

I stopped to chat with them as it was a nice sunny day out. The first question they asked me straight off the bat:

"Do you know about or have you read the bible?" I said:

"yes certainly, in fact I've read 7 different versions that all tell a very similar story going back into antiquity"

I was met with stoney faces. "You lost me.." one bloke said. "there is only 1 bible and its the first book ever written" The King James version he was referring to. I said "you haven't read the Chinese version of the KJB have you?

When they said no and asked why, I informed them that the Chinese changed their version many times over to be more Chinese market friendly... that doesn't sound like the unbreakable word of the creator to me.

Anywhoo... after about 20 minutes of them saying things, me asking subsequent thought provoking questions and hearing the respone 'you lost me again' i figured i would take a different route.

One of the men had started to complain about his brother, who was a devote catholic and that all they do is sit in church for an hour a week and sing and say things like the Lord's Prayer and they don't even understand the prayer at all. I thought, ok this is good...this other guy has some idea so perhaps here is an opening. I replied that i agree and most religions practice similarly and their members are just as lost. Then i asked " so i take it you understand what the lords prayer was?" He stated yes, it's the words Jesus gave us to worship his father.

Oh dear...i thought.

'Actually my friend it is an ancient Egyptian prayer attributed to a number of male deities potentially Ptah or Amun Ra.' i said.

...Stone faces engaged

"In fact when you say Amen you are praising Amun Ra the Egyptian sun God who was Marduk in Sumer's pantheon"

Faces now Granite.

"And just another little one for you, when you say the name Jesus you are worshipping ZEUS by hailing him Hail- ZEUS....Hey Zeus....Hejus...Jesus after the 17th century invention of the letter J of course.

Or potentially a combination of Jupiter and Zeus concurrently praised as the origins go back further that the mess Constantine made at Nicaea"

I was pretty much talking to a rock wall by that stage, i think one of them had started to gormlessly drool.

"Guys, im gonna go, its been a pleasure discussing theology and history with you...might i suggest that if you are going to publicly tell humans that specific groups of people do not understand what and/or why they are doing things to strengthen a message and thus potentially increase your recruitment numbers for a cause (for example stating a religious denomination chants prayers mindlessly because everyone else does it without understanding the background) You should probably ensure you understand the background yourself first."

That was about a 6 minute memory dump of that 30 minute convo. The rest was even more unbelievable to me, let alone them hahaha.

I wonder who I will freak out today? Does the pope have a direct phone line i can call?

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Oops i did it again....