To my self, write every day down like your just listening to the situation as it is and remember to ground yourself and stay calm. Ask questions that will help the situation. You need to remind yourself that people can not answer things for you when you have not listened and answer it for yourself you know, but also knowing that, do not lose sight of reality and being presence because your so caught up with your own you. It won’t be easy, but look around, don’t question the things you have the answer to, ask questions that will add value meaningful things, positivity. Sometimes in life we all need that nudge you know that all we need to do is listen and when we ask things that make sense then it can be helped, you can not cut someone off because you want to understand them when you haven’t given them a chance to finish and for you to just listen. When you just fully truely understand, you realise it’s just about listening and helping the situation for them you know, you may never agree but who said you had to agree by just listening and helping them for them. Finding inner peace is accepting the past for what it is and the presence for what it has to offer and become. Reality isn’t always as it seems or we hope but use it to your advantage you know, if you believe in something don’t let that be a reason for you to find a reason to justify it, find yourself, who knows maybe finding yourself is the answer to a trial to reality, not just for you but if you believe that then we all can, because one act of random kindness. Do things without questioning it, if you question it why do it in the first place you know. If your certain on something believe in it, Trish you never know maybe your bought into this life to be given a chance to be taught a valuable lesson and understand things in life has consequences and ripple affect but do not use that as an excuse for that reason, if you know that and you still believe and accepted your true self and listen and help the situation to have a better outcome then to you that’s peace then congratulations you are enlightened. Remember Trish if you believe in something your not alone, question life challenge it but remember do things for the better so you don’t ask the wrong questions, because why do things and expect answers when the real thing is u want questions to understand and help grow. We focus on so many emotions and situations we tend to ground ourself about the situation itself in just listening. We all do things that don’t make sense to certain people but have you taken the time and listen, ground and ask things that could benefit them. They never said you had to like or agree but if you truely wanted answers or questions then answer questions that will benefit them. Because how can they teach you to understand them when all your doing is justifying the situation. Did you not come to them to listen or understand them then do that, why can’t you for once just be presence in the moment with reality. If you really grounded and wanted to listen and understand then why justify a reason when you came to just understand. Trish I love your dumb ass so much but you can’t be scared anymore, you found peace so do it for you, you deserve it and one day life will shock you and heal because wasn’t that the end result of the situation, doing something that is positive. If I believe that I was gonna die early, would me asking u what u think change my mind? People who want to listen and understand but just feel the need to justify, but in the end I myself is bought here to tell you if you listen and be fkn presence and not be so quick to find a question to understand the situation and take it for how it is, isn’t the point whether you agree or not is to help bring positivity whether you agree or not. Once you listen be presence and ask questions to better them, you will realise that we didn’t justify the things we do or find an excuse but simple explaining it to you because you came to ask to understand so listen and just simple listen and ask the things that benefit the situation, because we know we aren’t perfect but did we ever turn back and find an excuse for the things you did. Who knows maybe the answer to me in life for parents healing from hurt or lost or anything is just listening and being presence to the things they ask to listen to. It’s simple, sometimes in our mind we want to put ourselves in everyone’s position but it’s like sometimes it’s simple answers we just over look it to understand them but never realise they came to them so your in their presence, sometimes you repeat it so much because it’s like if ask for something and want to help then why question them. It’s like why born us If through life experiences and loving us then love us for us, for myself I am someone who can proudly say sometimes it’s kids who show parents they’re not alone, simple as that, it may take two sides but it’s all about wanting to understand and be presence. It’s like we can turn and say the same to you but we don’t so as kids who learn and parents learn it’s just about accepting it is what it is and understnading and find a way to better it, whether u agree isn’t it right? Why still love us and show us your care is in a different way, but us is reaching out telling u our story is you just listening. Like why not do have life experiences you know, why not try everything go through for it ourselves because it’s your love for your kids like why do our kids have to show that we messed up but our way of helping u understand questions our doing for what reason, so as a kid yourself you never wish your parents could understand you, but i am

I wish I had friends I really do, someone to be with me, I’m very sorry you felt that it was cause ur were messaging you ex but I didn’t reac Don’t be afraid to be kind & inspire others t to that, even if u do get back together the only thing that scares me is I’ll lose you the one best friend I have and then I’ll have no one just memories, cause ur partner won’t like a person like that’s has feelings for you to be around you and then you will leave, when you left from the car i was close to tears that’s why I hugged you tightly but you just left me and I sat in the car and cried a lot after you left, I felt empty, your the girl I would do anything for, I don’t no what else to say, I want show you what I can do, when we were driving back I had my hand on ur leg and ur crossed ur legs and just looked away, I didn’t no what to say, I use to feel so alone that I tried to end my life but since I’ve been close to you I’ve felt much better and just don’t want to lose that, my heart and feelings are genuine that’s why I haven’t anything more than hug you, you stepping away from me hurts but you just being there going along with me keeps me going and I want that, and when and if you do chose someone over me I’ll walk away I promise until then just stay with me, I no things are complicated but I would never hurt you and always listen to you, I will lose my grandfather now I no cause his in his late 90s, I don’t want lose our closeness too love, I’m sorry for everything Always