What made you decide to leave? How many tries did it take before you left permanently? Statistics suggest it takes an average of 7 attempts before someone leaves an abusive relationship for good. For me, it was exactly 7. The first time, it was after about 10 months. The abuse was subtle at that stage. But I was sick of not being believed if I went to the shops to buy stuff and the item wasn’t there. I was doubted as to whether I’d even looked. I was also sick of being blamed for when things went wrong. The straw that broke the camels back was when I came home with fish and chips for dinner for everyone. I was berated for letting them put everything into a bag to carry easier. I left for a. couple of days and when I came back I started looking for somewhere else to live. I moved out without telling my ex partner and moved while he was out all day. I had my mum and my nana help me. I was in the shower later that evening when he turned up to talk. He’d gone through my phone the week before without me knowing and found out my plan and learnt where I was going. We talked in the car. I still didn’t know fully what he was at that stage so I believed him when he said he didn’t hold grudges and if I ever had a problem I should talk to him about it instead of running. I let him stay in my life when I should have cut and run. It was about 2 months later I let him move into that house with me. Crazy but as it turns out, quite a normal experience for many. Who else can relate?

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