Long story short, I've struggled with depression all my life and started getting out recently.
I've been eating self-help, philosophical, esoteric, spiritual, you name it, stuff for something like 5 years.
Even though as stated above it gets better, it is so painfully slow, I hate it.
Today I quite felt good, had the home for myself... and didn't do shit.
So in the end I just went back buying a bottle and I'm drinking again behind my computer.
Sorry for that, I guess I just needed to get it out of me.
I know, see, it gets better. I should make it with time.
But why does it have to be so slow?
God or something could just tell me what my purpose in life is and I could just get started at once.
I really feel like I'm wasting time I should be spending making the world a better place.
I feel sad and frustrated.