Feb 3 • SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS
Do you Know the WHY Instead of Just the What?
My pastor and long-time friend had just told me he was questioning his faith — and suddenly I looked at myself and realized I can quote scripture but can’t answer a single “why” question.
It was 10:32 PM on a Wednesday when Pastor Tim opened up to our small group. Not about someone else. About himself. A Seminary graduate who had led churches for 25 years. Now telling us, “I’m not sure I have real reasons for what I’ve been preaching.” His voice cracked when he said it. “I’ve taught people what to believe but I never examined why any of it is true.”
I drove home in silence, my hands gripping the steering wheel too tight. When I got home, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I sat at the kitchen table, staring at my Bible, realizing I was exactly the same.
I believe the Bible is true. But why? Because… it’s God’s Word? But how do I know it’s God’s Word Because the Bible says so?
My stomach dropped. Circular reasoning. The exact trap that’s destroying Pastor Mike’s faith right now.
I sat there — someone who’s been a Christian for 30 years — completely unable to defend the most basic claim of Christianity. The next morning, I tested myself again. Why did Jesus have to die? Why couldn’t God just forgive us? Because… we needed Jesus to save us? But why?
What would happen if God just said, “You’re forgiven,” without the cross? I had no idea.
I knew the story, but I didn’t understand the theology. That Friday at men’s breakfast, I brought it up.
Three other guys had the same problem. Believers for decades. Active in church. Yet they couldn’t explain why they believed a single word of it. We were a generation of Bible readers who would crumble the first time life forced us to ask “why?”
I spent that weekend obsessed. 1:47 AM Saturday night, I was reading articles about faith deconstruction. The pattern was everywhere. Adult Christians facing crisis, meeting their first real doubt, and having zero answers. Not because they were rebellious, because they’d been taught what to believe, but never why it’s true.
Sunday morning, I couldn’t focus during the sermon. I kept thinking about Pastor Mike. He looked so confident in the pulpit, so sure, but it was a house built on sand. One major crisis, one season of doubt, one hard question and it was all collapsing. That afternoon, I did something I’d never done before, I tried to explain the Trinity to myself. I knew it was “Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,” but when I asked how that works, I had nothing. When I asked why it matters that Jesus is God and not just a good teacher, I guessed. When I asked how we know the Bible wasn’t just written by men and changed over time, I said, “I think someone checked?” I’ve been a Christian for 30 years and couldn’t defend my faith for sixty seconds.
Two weeks later, I was at Barnes & Noble, standing in front of a wall of apologetics books. William Lane Craig, Lee Strobel, Tim Keller. All felt overwhelming. I didn’t need more reading, I needed to learn how to think. That’s when I heard a conversation behind me. Two guys, maybe mid-40s. “So if someone says Jesus was just copying other religions, what would you say?” One guy didn’t hesitate, “I’d explain the manuscript evidence and how the dying-and-rising god myths are actually different in six important ways. We covered that in week 19.”
I turned around and asked, “Excuse me — what are you studying?” He showed me a thick workbook called Systematic Theology for Adults. 52 weeks of actual arguments, not just devotionals. “I finally feel like I can defend what I believe,” he said. “My coworker challenged me about the resurrection last month. I spent twenty minutes walking through the historical evidence. It felt incredible. I just like knowing why things are true,” he shrugged.
I bought it immediately. That Sunday afternoon, I opened Lesson 1, “How Do We Know God Exists?” Not “the Bible tells us so,” actual arguments, the cosmological argument, the moral argument. A logical framework for why a First Cause must exist.
I leaned in. “Wait… so everything that begins has to have a cause? Even the universe?” I spent an hour on that one lesson. Two weeks in, something shifted. I wasn’t just reading — I was processing. Week 5 - I felt frustrated. “I get free will, but what about natural disasters?” I was wrestling. Not rejecting, not blindly accepting, actually thinking.
Week 8, we were at a family dinner when my agnostic brother said the Bible was “written by men.”
Before I could stop myself, I jumped in. “Do you know about the manuscript evidence? If you don’t trust the New Testament, you can’t trust anything we know about Julius Caesar either.” My brother was stunned. So was I, that’s when I knew this wasn’t memory work, this was understanding.
Three months later, I’m on lesson 31 of 52. I can explain the Trinity accurately, I know why Jesus had to be fully God and fully man and I can explain why the resurrection is historically credible.
Last week, a coworker asked me about my faith, and for the first time in 30 years, I didn’t panic. I had answers. Those Sunday sessions did what 30 years of church attendance couldn’t, they gave me a foundation.
I think about Pastor Tim constantly, about his broken voice, about 25 years of teaching something he never examined. He wasn’t stupid. He wasn’t rebellious. He just had no framework. No one taught him the why behind the what. I won’t be Pastor Tim. Not because I memorized more verses, but because I learned how to think theologically. That workbook sits on my desk, covered in notes and highlights. Proof that faith can be intellectually rigorous.
If you’ve spent years believing but collapsing under basic questions, you need to know there’s another way. Before the next crisis, before the next season of doubt. Don’t let doubt destroy what you haven’t examined. Not when there’s still time.
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Do you Know the WHY Instead of Just the What?
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