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We bury things so deep we no longer remember there was anything to bury
“We bury things so deep we no longer remember there was anything to bury. Our bodies remember. Our neurotic states remember. But we don't.” ― Jeanette Winterson This quote speaks to the way unresolved pain can disappear from conscious awareness without ever truly leaving us. The mind hides difficult experiences so well that a person may genuinely believe they are “fine,” or may not even realise something painful was pushed down in the first place. On the surface, there is no clear memory, no obvious story, no neat explanation. But underneath, the body and behaviour still carry the imprint. Our bodies remember emotional wounds, these often showing up physically. Tension, exhaustion, anxiety, stomach issues, a racing heart, shutting down, overreacting, or feeling unsafe for no reason can sometimes be the body holding what the mind has buried. Fear of abandonment, people pleasing, anger, perfectionism, overthinking, emotional numbness, or difficulty trusting others can all be signs that something unresolved is still active beneath awareness. We may not remember the original event clearly, but we keep living out its emotional consequences. A person may say, nothing happened, to them or they have never experienced trauma while their body, habits, and relationships will tell a different story. I find Jeanette's quote so powerful because it is not only about trauma in a dramatic sense. It can also apply to quieter wounds: years of not feeling seen, being criticised, having to stay small to keep the peace, learning not to cry, or growing up in an environment where emotions were not safe. These experiences can be buried so deeply they become invisible, yet they still influence identity and behaviour. This carries a challenge; healing is not just about remembering facts, but about noticing patterns. Sometimes recovery begins not with a memory, but with a symptom, a trigger, or a repeated emotional reaction. The body often tells the truth before the mind is ready to. What is buried is not gone. It lives on in the body, in behaviour, and in the emotional patterns you cannot explain. Until it is gently brought into awareness, it will continue to shape you.
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We bury things so deep we no longer remember there was anything to bury
What behaviour shift would change your relationships forever?
What behaviour shift would change your relationships forever? Most relationships are not struggling because of lack of love. They are struggling because of repeated patterns. Overreacting Shutting down Avoiding hard conversations People-pleasing Expecting others to read our minds Letting resentment build instead of speaking honestly The truth is, one behaviour repeated long enough can damage a relationship, but one new behaviour practised consistently can transform it. So be honest: What behaviour shift would change your relationships forever? Drop it in the comments #relationships #connection #selfawareness
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What behaviour shift would change your relationships forever?
Seeking new connecstions
Seeking those who have a growth mindset and those who want to overcome anger in their relationships for powerful shifts in their lives! Relationship, Communication & Mindset Coach NLP Certified Practitioner & Creator of the SCREEN Framework
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Seeking new connecstions
Overwhelm isn’t a sign you’re failing
Overwhelm isn’t a sign you’re failing, it’s a signal your brain and body have hit capacity. If you’ve been feeling mentally overloaded, emotionally drained, or stuck in procrastination… this is for you. Follow for more mindset + emotional regulation tools you can use in real life. 💛🦁
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When emotional connection is strong....
A marriage that can ride the storms isn’t built on never struggling it’s built on knowing how to come back to each other when you do. Life will bring pressure, misunderstandings, stress, and seasons where you feel more like teammates managing logistics than two people in love. What keeps a couple steady isn’t perfection, it’s a strong emotional connection: the sense of “I’m safe with you,” “You see me,” and “We’re in this together.” When emotional connection is strong, hard conversations feel possible and even in tension the love remains. You can disagree without feeling like you’re losing each other. You can face outside problems without turning into opponents inside the relationship. So if you’re in a storm right now, start small: slow down, get curious instead of defensive, and choose one moment today to reconnect a genuine check-in, a touch, an apology, or simply listening to understand. That’s how couples don’t just survive storms… they grow stronger through them. #relationships #marriedlife #relationshipadvice
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  When emotional connection is strong....
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