I want to be Happy again I want to see rainbows and butterflies Every time I close my eyes And reserve the right to be mesmerised, By the pure delight that awaits me every night; Waking up in the morning Ready to put the world to rights. No more fights or frights I want to feel alive. I want to be happy again. I want to laugh uncontrollably, So much that my belly hurts, my face aches And my body bursts; Into a thousand little funny bones, Watch, as the fragile and delicate things, Carefully piece themselves together and Turn into big beautiful wings, Making it easier to see where my sadness ends and happiness begins. I want to be happy again. I want to be the one that my friends can depend upon, Not the one who upon a friend needs to depend, Incase I break; Break down into a million little pieces, Glass rainbow dreams shattered and crumble As I fall to my knees, Desperate to breath. Please; I need to believe. I want to be happy again. I want to be the surprise That hits you right between the eyes As I walk into a room, because you confuse My smile with the sunrise, Spreading its rays like the scent of perfume And all of a sudden there's no more Doom or gloom left to consume. Eyes only on you, I'm reminded right now I have nothing to prove. I want to be happy again. I want my heart to beat so fast, That it beats out my chest And dances around like only it knows best. The best way to compensate For the heart ache that won't go away. I want my heart to dance my troubles away, As I watch it with a smile on my face, Knowing eventually everything will turn out okay. I want to be happy again. I want to dance in the pouring rain No longer feeling the pain That each little splash brings to my face; Clouds the shape of tear ducts, Pin pricks falling, piercing my skin As the poisoning begins, Tainting my thoughts with memories and eventualities. Too many realities are taking toll on my sanity. I want to be happy again... I want you to build me a staircase Out of rubber bands, hold out your hands,

This poem just won 3rd place in The Diamond Quill contest. I wrote this last year around this time. A touch, a word, a fleeting glance, A whispered hope, a second chance. The way we treat the ones in pain Can mend the soul or leave a stain. A child who cries in silent fear, A wound ignored, unseen, yet near. A gentle hand, a kind embrace, Can turn the darkness into grace. The doctor mends, the healer sighs, A patient pleads with weary eyes. A single dose, a bandage tight, Yet kindness proves the true respite. For scars are more than flesh and bone, Some linger deep, some stand alone. And how we treat the broken hearts Determines if the healing starts. A sentence laced with bitter steel, Can cut as deep as blades that kill. A careless jest, a sharp critique, Can shake the strong and wound the weak. Yet words, when placed with love and care, Can lift despair from weighted air. A compliment, a simple cheer, Can wipe away the silent tear. How do we treat the ones we meet? With words like daggers, cold and fleet? Or do we gift them warmth and light, And guide them gently through the night? The way we treat the weak and small, Defines the height from which we fall. The beggar left without a name, The outcast bathed in silent shame. A world that turns from pleading eyes, Will find itself where mercy dies. Yet justice, when it stands alone, Is nothing but a heart of stone. To treat with fairness is to blend The hand of law with love’s amend. For punishment with no reprieve Leaves hollow hearts that can’t believe. A second chance, a moment spared, Might show the world someone still cares. And in that light, in fate’s own hand, A shattered soul may learn to stand. The Treatment We Give Ourselves But what of how we treat our skin, Our weary bones, the soul within? Do we demand, yet never rest, And wear our burdens like a vest? The mirror shows a tale unkind, Reflections shaped by judging mind. We speak to self with cruel disdain, And drown in doubt, embrace the pain.

I’ve felt this way so many times, Time and time again the same questions always surface, What is this feeling? Why do I feel like I’m bleeding? Bleeding from within my mind? Trying to listen only to my heart Sharpened frame Assuming I’m insane Neurotic to the core It seems is my only flaw I know this won’t be the last time

I imagine you dressed in black With short covered hair A smirk on your grin That makes me tremble and my lips flare I imagine your eyes As dark as the darkest sky that exists in an undiscovered world, where we yet cannot fly I imagine the kiss to be tender, yet strong As your lips connect mine, I feel you embrace me with the greatest sense of time To imagine the kiss, the kiss before words Is akin to imagining the bliss We may share for the rest of our lives The kiss before words The kiss before time The kiss will be there The kiss will be on time

My current feeling is good and bad Very rarely feeling sad My position is ultimately in resolution Free from negativity and confusion I am free and creativity Flows from my frontal lobes Like the wine found within this globe But I don't feel completed And not at all relaxed and conceded How does one attain this level Like a parched and convoluted fellow Now I ramble and stumble Until the feeling is just a little comfortable A rare feeling of instability Escapes my thoughts Like the truly defeated Oh how I wish not to be COMPLETED