What Fear Actually Means (And How to Talk to It)

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Here's another perspective on fear that might shift how we relate to it: F.E.A.R. stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.

Think about it... most of what we're afraid of hasn't happened yet. We're reacting to phantom evidence—projections of past pain onto an imagined future. The fear feels real, but the danger usually isn't.

Here's the deeper truth: fear is always the absence of love. It's a wall separating us from our own power. On the other side of every fear is a denied aspect of our magnificence that we haven't claimed yet.

When we're afraid to raise our rates, launch that offer, post that content, or have that difficult conversation—we're not actually in danger. We're projecting. What if they reject me? What if I'm not ready? What if I fail?

But here's what changes everything: we can actually talk to our fear.

Next time fear shows up, try this: Admit it first. "I'm feeling afraid right now." Just naming it takes some of its power.

Then ask it: "What are you trying to protect me from?" Listen. Really listen. The fear might say it's protecting us from rejection, from looking foolish, from being hurt.

Then ask: "What's on the other side of this wall?" Often it's exactly what we've been wanting—more visibility, more impact, more abundance, more authentic connection.

The key is staying present. When we're fully in this moment—not mentally time-traveling to imagined futures—most anxiety dissolves. Fear can't exist in the now. It only lives in our projections.

So we can feel the fear and move forward anyway. We can acknowledge it, thank it for trying to protect us, and then act from our power instead of from the fear.

What fear has been creating a wall between us and something we deeply want?

The Overcoming Fear course in the Classroom walks through this entire process—how to identify what our fears are protecting, how to dialogue with them, and how to reclaim the power waiting on the other side.

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