Jul 15 • General discussion
WHEN GOD IS CHANGING YOUR CIRCLE
(a message that came from this mornings Pod)
Finding God in Pain, Separation, and Loneliness
There are moments in life when you pray, "God, change my circle. Remove the wrong people. Bring the right people into my life."
But sometimes we are not prepared for what happens next.
Because before God brings the new people, sometimes the old people begin to leave.
The phone gets quieter.
The invitations stop.
People you thought would always be there suddenly seem distant.
Relationships change.
Friendships end.
And you begin to wonder:
"God, I asked You to change my circle. I didn't ask You to leave me alone."
But I want to minister to somebody today:
You may feel alone, but you have not been abandoned.
You may be isolated, but you are not invisible.
You may be hurting, but you have not been forgotten.
Sometimes there is a painful space between what God is removing and what God is bringing.
And that space can feel incredibly lonely.
I. JOSEPH — THE PIT CAME BEFORE THE PALACE
Joseph knew what it was to lose his circle.
His own brothers hated him.
They stripped him of his coat.
They threw him into a pit.
They sold him into slavery.
Then after faithfully serving in Potiphar's house, Joseph was falsely accused and thrown into prison.
Genesis 39:20-21 says:
"And Joseph's master took him, and put him into the prison, a place where the king's prisoners were bound: and he was there in the prison. BUT THE LORD WAS WITH JOSEPH, and shewed him mercy, and gave him favour in the sight of the keeper of the prison."
Don't miss those words:
"But the LORD was with Joseph."
His family wasn't with him.
His brothers weren't with him.
His father wasn't with him.
His friends weren't with him.
But God was with him.
Sometimes God will allow every familiar voice to grow quiet until His voice becomes the loudest voice in your life.
Joseph could not see the palace from the pit.
He could not see his purpose from the prison.
All he could see were walls.
But while Joseph saw walls, God saw preparation.
While Joseph felt forgotten, God was positioning him.
While Joseph was suffering privately, God was preparing him to lead publicly.
Your isolation does not necessarily mean that God has rejected you.
Sometimes it means that God is developing something in you that cannot be produced in the noise of the crowd.
II. DAVID — ANOINTED, BUT ALONE IN THE WILDERNESS
David was anointed to be king, but he did not immediately receive a throne.
He received a wilderness.
He received rejection.
He received caves.
He received betrayal.
He had spears thrown at him by a man he had faithfully served.
There were moments when David was painfully alone.
Psalm 142:4-5 says:
"I looked on my right hand, and beheld, but there was no man that would know me: refuge failed me; no man cared for my soul. I cried unto thee, O LORD: I said, Thou art my refuge and my portion in the land of the living."
Listen to the honesty of David:
"No man cared for my soul."
That is loneliness.
That is pain.
That is the ache of looking around and wondering, "Does anybody see me? Does anybody understand what I'm carrying?"
But David discovered something in the cave:
When human refuge fails, God remains.
He said:
"Thou art my refuge."
Sometimes you don't discover that God is enough until everything you thought you needed is taken away.
Not because people don't matter.
Not because relationships don't matter.
But because no human being was ever designed to carry the weight that only God can carry.
People can encourage you.
People can love you.
People can walk beside you.
But only God can be your ultimate refuge.
III. ELIJAH — EVEN STRONG PEOPLE GET LONELY
Elijah called fire down from heaven.
He stood against hundreds of false prophets.
He experienced supernatural victory.
But shortly afterward, Elijah became overwhelmed, afraid, exhausted, and alone.
In 1 Kings 19:4, Elijah sat beneath a juniper tree and said:
"It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers."
This mighty man of God was hurting.
This prophet of fire felt empty.
And here's what I love about God:
God did not condemn Elijah for being exhausted.
God gave him rest.
God gave him food.
God spoke to him gently.
And eventually, God gave him Elisha.
That's important.
Because isolation may be a season, but it was never meant to become Elijah's permanent identity.
God met Elijah alone, but He didn't leave him alone forever.
So hear me carefully:
Don't mistake a season of isolation for a sentence of abandonment.
God may be separating you from unhealthy relationships, but He is not calling you to live without love, fellowship, accountability, or godly connection forever.
Sometimes God empties the room before He changes the guest list.
Sometimes He closes one chapter before He introduces the people who belong in the next one.
IV. JESUS — THE LONELIEST ROAD EVER WALKED
No one understands loneliness like Jesus.
Isaiah 53:3 says:
"He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief..."
Jesus knew rejection.
He knew betrayal.
Judas betrayed Him.
Peter denied Him.
The disciples fled from Him.
And on the cross, Jesus cried:
"My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?"
— Matthew 27:46
Jesus understands the agony of feeling alone.
So when you cry in the middle of the night, He understands.
When you stare at your phone wishing somebody would call, He understands.
When people you loved suddenly disappear, He understands.
When you've been misunderstood, rejected, left out, or forgotten, Jesus understands.
Hebrews 4:15 says:
"For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities..."
You are not praying to a God who is unfamiliar with pain.
Jesus has walked through rejection.
Jesus has experienced sorrow.
Jesus has tasted betrayal.
And because He has overcome, you will not walk through this alone.
V. DON'T CURSE THE QUIET SEASON
I want to tell someone today:
Don't curse the quiet season.
Don't assume because fewer people are around you that your life has less value.
Don't measure your worth by how many people text you.
Don't measure God's presence by how many invitations you receive.
Don't measure your destiny by how crowded the room is.
God did some of His deepest work with Moses in the wilderness.
With Joseph in prison.
With David in caves.
With Elijah by the brook.
With Paul in Arabia.
And with Jesus in the wilderness.
Sometimes God takes us away from the applause so we can learn obedience.
Away from distraction so we can hear His voice.
Away from dependency on people so our roots can grow deeper in Him.
Isaiah 43:18-19 says:
"Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert."
Notice where God makes the way.
In the wilderness.
Notice where He sends the rivers.
Into the desert.
The wilderness is not proof that God has left you.
The wilderness may become the very place where you see God make a way that could have been made nowhere else.
VI. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU FEEL ALONE?
First, tell God the truth about your pain.
You don't have to pretend.
David didn't.
Elijah didn't.
Jesus didn't.
Psalm 34:18 says:
"The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit."
God is not repelled by your brokenness.
He draws near to it.
Second, do not run back to relationships that God has delivered you from simply because loneliness hurts.
Sometimes loneliness will tempt you to return to places God brought you out of.
Don't trade your future for temporary company.
Don't return to dysfunction because silence feels uncomfortable.
Wait on God.
Third, remain open to the new people God will send.
God told Elijah there were still seven thousand MEN who had not bowed to Baal.
Elijah thought he was the only one.
He wasn't.
And neither are you.
There are still godly people.
There are still faithful friends.
There are still MEN who will pray with you, sharpen you, love you, tell you the truth, celebrate you without jealousy, and walk with you without using you.
Maybe you haven't met them yet. MAYBE YOU HAVE (HLH)
FINAL ENCOURAGEMENT
My brother, hear me today:
You are not forgotten.
You are not abandoned.
You are not invisible.
Yes, it hurts when people leave.
Yes, rejection is painful.
Yes, loneliness is real.
And we should never minimize that pain.
But what feels like an ending may be a transition.
What feels like rejection may be redirection.
What feels empty today may be the room God is preparing to fill tomorrow.
You prayed:
"God, change my circle."
Now trust Him through the transition.
DON'T CHASE EVERYBODY WHO LEAVES.
DON'T BEG EVERYBODY TO STAY.
Don't assume every departure is a defeat.
Some people were for a season.
scaffolding
/ˈskafəldiNG/
Scaffolding refers to a temporary framework used to support workers and materials during construction, or—metaphorically—a support system to help learners achieve a new skill.
_______________
Some were for a lesson.
Some were for a chapter.
And some people God is still preparing to meet you down the road.
But until then, remember the words of Jesus in Hebrews 13:5:
"I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."
People may leave.
God won't.
Relationships may change.
God won't.
The room may get quiet.
But Heaven has not forgotten your name.
You may be alone in the room, but YOU ARE NEVER ALONE IN THE ROOM.
God is there.
And the God who was with Joseph in the prison, David in the cave, Elijah in the wilderness, and Jesus in Gethsemane is with you right now.
PRAYER
Father, in the name of Jesus, I pray for the person who feels alone today.
I pray for the one who is hurting because people have left. For the one grieving friendships, relationships, family connections, and familiar voices that are no longer there.
Lord, meet them in the quiet.
Meet them in the pain.
Meet them in the midnight hour when nobody else knows the tears they cry.
Remind them that they have not been abandoned.
Remind them that they have not been forgotten.
Remind them that when father and mother forsake us, then the Lord will take us up.
Heal the wounds of rejection.
Break the fear of abandonment.
Protect them from running back to unhealthy relationships simply because they are lonely.
Give them discernment to know what to release, what to restore, what to wait for, and who to trust.
And Father, in Your time, bring the right people.
Bring godly friendships.
Bring encouragers.
Bring brothers and sisters who will pray, sharpen, love, challenge, and strengthen them.
And until the new thing fully appears, teach us to find our refuge in You.
Make a way in the wilderness.
Send rivers into the desert.
And let this painful season become holy ground.
In the mighty name of Jesus Christ we pray.
Amen.
"Sometimes God empties the room before He changes the guest list." -HLH Coach Aaron Trimble
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WHEN GOD IS CHANGING YOUR CIRCLE
