The mention of going to church sent my kids into an immediate refusal and screaming fest.
We don’t go on a regular basis, it’s not in our routine to go, but it’s something that my wife and I want to get back to.
This one, we chose to just go and take what comes at us.
Here were the strategies we used
- Set them up on a show to get thier mind off it when we got them dressed
- Created a visual schedule focusing on FUN AFTER- first church then dollar store!
- Eliminated any verbal negotiations by not responding, just ignoring moving along.
- When we get into the car you can watch one more episode,
- When we got to the church- it was more refusal
We were late, my wife and I are used to separating now, I said. I’ll just got for 20, you stay with kids then we’ll switch, the boys eventually came into the church but not to the service area.
They ended up having cinnamon rolls in the cafeteria, so my wife took them there and I enjoyed a peaceful service full of Christmas music and quiet message.
This is a win for us.
Last year I would have been crying, so angry and upset that our family can’t even go to church together. But my expectations have shifted and I have learned to let go of some of these societal expectations and really focus on my family. When I do that, the guilt lessens, the anxiety dissipates the urgency is minimal. I’m here, doing my best and so are my kids and that’s ok.
They went to church, it looked different and that’s ok. Next week we’ll try again❤️