Addiction impacts everyone in the family. That's why it's called a "family disease". It's important for recovering addicts to understand how trauma works, just like it's important for family members to recognize their own pain. Not for blame or score keeping, but for healing. We can't heal what we don't acknowledge.
This PDF will help you understand how unresolved emotional pain drives addiction, and also keeps family members stuck by focusing on the addict instead of their own pain.
Most families hide their own pain, believing that "once the addict gets better, then, the family will be okay". It's not unusual for an addict in recovery to actually outgrow familiy members on an emotional level when the addict is the only one seeking to heal. When family members also seek their own healing, it changes the entire family dynamic.
Let me know what you learn about yourself after reading this.