1d • Community Chat
Momentum Begins in the Mind
Not long ago, I was introduced to the idea of pronoia — and what I’ve experienced since has honestly put some things in perspective that haven't been before.
Pronoia is the belief that life is not conspiring against you, but for you. It’s the opposite of paranoia. And while that may sound abstract or ungodly at first, what I’ve learned is very practical. Very within the realm that God operates in.
Here’s the truth most of us don’t want to admit: We’re exhausted not because of what actually happens in our marriage or family but because of what we anticipate might happen.
Is pain part of life? Yes.
Is pain the whole story? No. Resistance is the problem.
In remarriage and blended family life, resistance shows up everywhere.
Bracing for conflict
Waiting for the next shoe to drop
Assuming hard conversations will go badly
Expecting ex-related problems to come up
Preparing for disappointment before it even arrives
I’ve been there.
What’s changed is this: I’ve taken responsibility for where my focus goes. I deliberately notice what’s going right. And then I take it one step further... I choose to look at what’s coming and expect God to work in it.
Not passively but intentionally.
And the result has been surprising.
Things that would normally trigger stress, anxiety, or control in me have been… calm. Manageable. Even peaceful. Kinda like another present waiting to be opened.
A real example: our house in Idaho is currently under contract. That waiting period, inspections, financing, uncertainty, has always been stressful for me in the past. I could never fully explain why. It just was.
This time has been different.
Yes, I prayed. But I also made a decision not to live mentally ahead of the process. I chose to believe that God was already present in the outcome. And this has been the smoothest real estate experience I’ve ever had.
Here’s what God has been showing me: My mindset sets the tone for everything!
For my marriage, my family, my friendships and the outcomes I experience.
This is exactly what Mike, and I teach. Unity doesn’t start with circumstances changing. Momentum doesn’t come from waiting for peace. It begins when you choose how you will show up, before the results are visible.
That is the action.
So, if you want to reach your highest potential — in your marriage, your blended family, and your life — don’t dismiss the concept of pronoia. Study it. Apply it. Test it.
For the next season, what would change if you stopped bracing for the worst and started partnering with God in expectation instead?
That’s momentum.
💗
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Momentum Begins in the Mind
skool.com/blendedfamilymomentum
A community for remarried couples ready to protect their marriage & lead their blended family, led by Mike & Brenda Baker, married 30 years.
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