I feel….. I am….. My issue….. All statements that we randomly say without thinking about the effect those works have on is. When we label ourselves we are concreting those emotions. Setting them in stone with no room for change. Language is everything. In our horsemanship, but also in every day life. Be careful what you wish for…..be careful what you say. Take notice of the following statements and notice the difference in them, how each of them feel, even though they are very similar statements. ‘ I am so tired of everything. Life is hard.’ ‘ I’m am feeling tired right now. Life can be hard sometimes.’ One is final, one is temporary. This allows us to feel like we can do something to improve things, rather than feel defeated. Hear yourself. It’s the first step in self care.

Finding balance while you’re with horses is essential for consistency, relationship and success. Too much intention and it creates pressure. No plan and we flounder and don’t move forward. So how do we have goals and not be over focussed, and how do we set goals and still keep the relationship front of mind. It’s all about perception. If you believe training is hard, pressure, work not fun, then you are more likely to struggle to get on with it. If you’re driven, a goal oriented mindset, love pushing thru then you’re likely to be over focussed and turn training into a job and over do things. Your perception is yours and that’s ok, but we need to look at our patterns to work out what needs to change in order to find balance. Horsemanship is about us more than horses and to be our best we have to look at ourselves way before we start blaming the horses. Easy for some. Others have a pattern of moving a horse on, only to encounter the same issue in the next horse. Horse humble us, or at least they should. It’s our job to self assess and better ourselves for the sake of our journey. Take a moment today to think about patterns and how you much we get stuck in them. It’ll change a little something that your horse will appreciate.

The real test when training horses is to be flexible and able to change. Every horse is different, but we tend to be stuck in our ways, so being able to read horses is a real skill. Listen and watch, like it’s the first time you’ve worked with a horse. Imagine them as unknown (hard to do but imperative if we want to expand). As a trainer it’s easy for me as I work with new horses all the time and I have to listen to what each one needs, so if you only have one horse see if you can swap horses for a day and look at how you respond: Growth comes from thinking outside the square - and horses love for us to grow

Just because we dont cope well with something doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do it. Pressure for a horse is learning to cope. It’s new situations, new training, new gear. All of this essential for your horses improvement. Learning that pressure - and more importantly, the release of pressure isn’t a bad thing will take your relationship to the next level. It may be hard to start with, but before long it’ll be just another thing ticked off.

Many times when training we need to wait. Wait for the release, wait for the emotions to come down, wait for the learning. It’s more of a waiting game than most people have time for. Our busy lives have us always in a hurry and this can be very detrimental to your relationship with your horse. If we think about setting up and waiting more than making it happen the pressure comes off. The expectation drops, the patience increases. Try your hand at something different. Think it. Set it up. Wait. Release. Just hold, don’t fight, don’t force, just hold and release with the right answer. It’s a magic way to train. Your horse will thank you.