Lately I’ve been having these cycles of extreme shame… some weeks are a solid flow state where i feel motivated and productive and more of the version i want to be and other weeks I’m not. I have a hard time coping with certain emotions maybe and i let them get the best of me? I feel my feelings get the best of me quick and my mind is already 10 steps ahead before i even catch the behaviors i am doing. I have high very high expectations for myself and I put so much on my plate because i want to succeed badly(like a never ending to do list)… but it’s almost like it’s not even ambition because i make these goals so unattainable for the state of being i am in if that makes sense. For ex: I’ve started a new workout routine plus probiotic diet and even the littlest of a cheat meal or off day i have I judge myself. It’s hard for me to understand if it’s ambition or a trauma response to trying to be perfect. It’s like a reinforcement to the shame stored within me. Any advice on ways to cope from self loathing would be much appreciated ❤️

I was curious on how or if i should even address my childhood best friend if he’s still in contact with an ex friend of mine who expressed narcissistic traits towards me? Basically my best friend knows what my ex roomate/friend did to me and I believe he’s still in contact with him via a group chat… it makes me uncomfortable as i don’t want anything to do with this ex friend again and me being empathetic and loyal i wouldn’t want to continue being a friend with someone who hurt my best friend dearly. Just looking for advice to address this or if i even should? Thanks!