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Owned by Rachel
A space to move from survival-based relating to secure intimacy through healthy conflict, repair, ownership, and growth.
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Skoolers
195.6k members • Free
7 contributions to LevelUp Collective
Feb 17 •Â
👋 Introduce Yourself — Let’s Build Intentionally
Welcome to LevelUp Collective. This is a space for adults who are ready to grow in how they relate — not blame, not diagnose, not dissect other people. Before we go anywhere, introduce yourself below 👇 Share whatever feels aligned and consider answering a few of these: • What brings you here right now? • What type of relationship are you most wanting to improve? (romantic, work, family, self) • When conflict happens, what’s your default pattern? (take over, withdraw, get sharp, over-explain, etc.) • What does “secure” feel like to you? • What is one relational pattern you’re ready to take ownership of? You don’t have to overshare. You don’t have to perform. This isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being willing. And willingness is powerful. 👇
1 like • 4d
@Lindsay Aceto welcome. And thank you for being this honest right out the gate. The level of self-awareness in your post matters more than perfection ever will. What you shared makes a lot of sense. When someone has spent years masking, managing overwhelm, and learning to protect themselves, those patterns do not just disappear because the heart wants peace. Research on masking in autistic and ADHD adults shows it can come with real relational strain, exhaustion, and a disconnect between what someone feels internally and how they are able to express it outwardly. Difficulties with self-regulation can also make it harder to pause and respond the way you actually want to in charged moments. What stands out in your post is that you are already taking ownership. You are not just saying “this is how I am,” you are naming the pattern and the impact. That is a powerful place to begin. Wanting security to feel like not having to mask and being safe from judgment makes so much sense. And the fact that you can see the difference between reacting from a trigger and responding with maturity tells me you already have insight, even if the nervous system has not fully caught up yet. I’d definitely start with the Unlocking the Relationships You Desire masterclass which you can access in this community on the about page. I also think the freebies 'Learn Compassion for Our Triggers and Reactions' along with 'Inner Wisdom' bia my website: levelupwithrachel.com then click the 'courses' option.... these would support you really well because this work is not just about changing what you say, it is about understanding what is happening underneath it so you can meet yourself differently first. You are welcome here. And you do not need to get this right all at once or fast. Awareness, willingness, and practice will take you much further than shame ever will. Glad you are here. :)
1 like • 4d
@Lindsay Aceto wonderful 🙂
27d •Â
Releasing the need to hold it all
A lot of people are carrying tension they don’t even realize they’re holding. In their shoulders. Their jaw. Their chest. Their stomach. They’re holding the day. Holding the pressure. Holding everyone else. Holding themselves together. And then wondering why they feel tired, edgy, disconnected, or like they can’t fully breathe. Today’s practice is about letting your body feel that it does not have to grip so hard. Today’s Somatic Reset (approx 3 minutes): Stand or sit with both feet flat on the ground. Let your spine be tall, but not stiff. Take one deep inhale through your nose. Exhale out of your mouth like you’re fogging up a mirror. Now bring awareness to these 4 places one by one: Your jaw Your shoulders Your chest Your belly For each area, gently tense it for 5 seconds.Then fully release. Jaw — clench, then soften. Shoulders — shrug them up, then drop them. Chest — tighten slightly, then let it open. Belly — brace, then let it go. After that, place one hand on your chest and one hand on your lower belly. Take 4 slow belly breaths. With each exhale, say quietly to yourself: I do not have to hold everything right now. On your final breath, let your shoulders drop again and soften your face. That’s it. Reflection: What are you unconsciously holding in your body today? What changes when you give yourself permission to soften, even for a moment?
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Mar 10 •Â
Coming Back Into Your Body Before You Speak
A lot of women don’t speak from truth. They speak from activation. They speak too fast. Over-explain. Shut down. Say “I’m fine” when they’re not. Not because they’re bad communicators. Because their body doesn’t feel safe yet. Today’s practice is about returning to your body before you respond, explain, or react. Today’s Somatic Reset (approx 3 minutes): Stand up and place both feet firmly on the ground.Bend your knees slightly so you’re not locking your legs. Place both hands on your thighs. Take a slow inhale through your nose.Then exhale out of your mouth with a sigh. Now gently press your hands into your thighs for 10 seconds.Release. Do that 3 times. As you press, think: I am here. I am safe in my body. I do not have to rush. Next, roll your shoulders back 5 times slowly. Then unclench your jaw and soften your tongue. Place one hand on your heart and one on your belly. Take 3 slow breaths and ask yourself: What am I actually feeling right now? What is actually true in this moment? What do I need before I speak? That’s it. Reflection: How often do you rush to respond before your body has even caught up?What shifts when you let yourself pause first?
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Mar 4 •Â
Check in
When something feels tense in a relationship, what’s your first instinct?
Poll
7 members have voted
1 like • Mar 5
@Barb Mahaffey thank you for sharing, I was/still kind of the same depending on who it is, how much sleep I've had, etc. The difference now is my awareness is much faster and have the tools to move through it quicker. 🙂
Mar 2 •Â
Movement Monday
Theme: Interrupting the Reactivity Loop When something triggers or upsets you, your body reacts before your mind does.If you don’t reset your body, you’ll try to solve an emotional reaction with logic and that’s where overthinking starts. Today’s Somatic Reset (approx 3 minutes): 1. Stand up or if in a seated position put both feet on the ground and sit up tall. 2. Close your eyes and take notice of how your body feels for 30 seconds. 3. Next, open your eyes if you want then shake your arms and shoulders for 30 seconds. 4. While doing this, exhale loudly through your mouth. 5. Place one hand on your chest, one on your lower belly. 6. Take 4 slow breaths in from your belly, longer exhale than inhale. 7. Relax your jaw consciously. That’s it. Take notice again of how your body feels. What difference do you feel in your body before vs. after?
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@rachel-beaudette-5077
I teach you how to turn conflict into connection through inner child awareness, repair skills, and emotional ownership.
Active 6h ago
Joined Aug 24, 2025