Welcome Darlings, gather close. The Lady of the Hatch brings you a tale of Stitch, Angel, and the 15 goslings they are fostering with the intensity of two overworked stage moms. Two nights ago, I separated them from the babies for a moment — a moment — and Stitch acted like I’d personally shattered his entire family tree. He puffed up, hissed like a tea kettle possessed, and delivered a side‑eye so venomous it could’ve wilted the grass. Angel stood behind him like she was ready to call a lawyer. Fast‑forward to the next morning: I lead all 15 foster goslings home, and suddenly Stitch — the same bird who tried to hex me — is prancing and dancing in the fresh water like he’s celebrating their triumphant return from war. Angel joined in like she’d choreographed the whole thing. Not a hint of last night’s rage. Not a whisper of accountability. Just two dramatic foster parents rejoicing like I hadn’t been emotionally mugged twelve hours earlier. Now it’s your turn, darlings. Tell us your funniest gander story — the one that still makes you laugh even though it absolutely shouldn’t.