"And I'll become even more undignified than this"
Hi, I'm Monique. I found you through this community through Sistership Circle FB group. I am currently reading Anna, Grandmother of Jesus which my "auntie" housemates loaned to me. It turns out she has been initiated into the Magdalene order (I'm not sure what that means yet)... but it's beautiful and she is a wonderful human. I chose to follow Christ when I was 6 years old. My mom ran away from a religious and abusive environment when she was 12 and found her way back to church-God when she was around 27...I was 6. It was our long haired hippy pastor landlord couple downstairs that shared with me about Jesus! When I heard his name...it sounds like magical sparkling flying unicorns with rainbows. I was like who is that!? She was sharing with us basic bible stories for kids but there was so much more energy on it!!! No, really! WHO is that!!!? I asked mom...she told me...we knelt down in the living room and I said I want to be Jesus friend..."come live in my heart"... I'd learn later he was there all along. But that's how it started (with words) for me! From then on Jesus and I were best friends. I went to church...I liked it more than mom...she was a single divorced woman but I was a happy child...though I eventually picked up on people's weirdness towards her. Obviously NOT Jesus-like. So yah...I was on the youth leadership team and worship team, I read my Bible, I did't kiss a boy until I was 18. I enjoyed the community, the potlucks, the playmates, the friendships, all that good stuff!!! Life altering kindness (despite weirdness)! No regrets. But then in my later 20's I just couldn't feel great at church anymore... I was at one church...some people called it the last church they would ever go to because it was hip, cutting edge, small, granola-like, social justice minded, down to earth, honoured artists, served those on the streets etc...all that is true. And yet, there was also some weird clicky-ness (human behaviour really) and no hugs weirdness (as always - eye roll- ...except for the friendly warm hearted happily married Aussie pastor. Thank God!). But that church was really focused on the sadness, the mourning and the lamenting. Lord have mercy!