It's a new week. What's the focus for you? And can we help? For me it's being more focused on what I and taking care of what I need to do to make it happen

Today is my mom’s 53rd birthday… and tomorrow she goes into surgery for breast cancer. And my birthday is Sunday. And honestly? This is a whole fucked up mix of emotions I don’t even know how to process. How am I supposed to celebrate when my mom is sitting here in pain… scared… facing all these what-ifs? How do I smile and act like everything’s okay when it’s not? I’m angry. I’m scared. I’m overwhelmed as hell. I’m scared of losing my mom. I said it. Cancer is a word that hits different when it’s YOUR person. And ever since March, it’s been one emotional storm after another… and today it’s hitting me hard. What hurts even more? I lost time with her before because of family struggles. Time I can never get back. And now that we’re finally finding our way back to each other… it feels like life is trying to rip her away before we even get the chance to fully heal and be close again. That shit hurts. Deep. Yeah, I’m going off grid for a couple days… trying to breathe, trying to reset… but let’s be real—my anxiety is through the roof, my depression is loud, and my heart feels like it’s getting pulled in a million directions. So I’m asking… no pride, no filter— Pray for my mom. Michelle. Pray for her strength. Pray for her peace. Pray for healing. Pray she comes out of this surgery safe and still here with me. Because I’m not ready to lose her. Not now. Not like this. 🖤 Spartan Kai

What's up guys?! Sorry ive been a little MIA the last few days. Ive been dealing with crazy stuff on a lot of different fronts. And it's made me think do I have egg on my face?

It's amazing how much frustration can fuel you. After realizing probably heading to Africa next year without the usual levels of support that I have from my blood family. I went to the gym yesterday. Like I normally do, to help a buddy run his adaptive fitness class. And like normal i went in a couple hours early to get my own workout in,( because my level of intensity does he match the level that most of the people in that class have). After thirty minutes on the ski erg this was the end result

I think the biggest struggle that i'm dealing with right now is family support and I don't mean that my family doesn't think I should goI think the biggest struggle that I'm dealing with right now is family support and I don't mean that my family doesn't think I should go.\n They just don't think I should go right now. Because I don't have income to help With cost, even though fundraising has been set up\nThey just don't get that's what it's for.