5d • General discussion
What The Faith?! But why?
Greetings & Salutations!
What the Faith?! Is a the kind of group I wasn't finding out in the world. I was once attending 4 church services every Sunday, and in Los Angeles, so I thought for sure I would find what I was looking for. Not only did I not find a church community that was for me I also found more stress and heartache. I found judgment and anxiety. To be clear, the churches I attended were great, but the small group opportunities kept missing the mark. Most churches have the same type of safe small groups available (women's ministry, men's ministry, youth ministry, & bible study), all good, but I've attended and walked away wishing for a deeper dive into real-world struggles and how to navigate through.
Who am I, you ask? Feel free to read my short bio on "About". I am in recovery for something called a MINOCA cardiac event. One of the better types of heart attacks you can have, but still, the worst 6 hours of my life. Apparently, you can give yourself a heart attack by burning out at work. Yeah, it's a (terrifying) thing, you can Google it.
What I've found on my journey that works for me:
Worship music - I have a playlist I am always adding to for whatever I am going through, so when I catch myself in a tough time, I stop and worship through it. Honestly, I have music on all the time.
I wrote biblical truth on butcher paper, on my bedroom wall. When times are extremely tough, I sometimes wake up and find my mind already under attack. Seeing my wall of truth helps bring my mind back and usually is a pre-funk to prayer.
Prayer.
I am talking to The Father, Son & Holy Spirit constantly. Being a single gal, I accidentally called Jesus "babe"... twice. Real-world problems over here, people. Super vulnerable sharing that with you, but if you can relate, it's worth it.
Needless to say, I have only been a Christian since 2019, so I still consider myself new. The biggest struggles I am facing today is what the heck is going on in the world? I have to stay away from the news since my nervous system is fried, but my friends are all turned off by religion and church because of what is going on, and it's exhausting. Also, mental wellness and peace have to be my priority these days. Where do I find a community that can relate and maybe is also struggling? I create one. That's where.
So here we are. Curious, hopeful, and dare I say... vulnerable?
I want to do right by God, I want to align my heart every day... but I need community. Where are the black sheep, misfits, harmed, recovering, and sometimes depressed? Where are the real strugglers? I know I'm not the only one.
That, plus my journey towards being an ordained minister and certified Christian counselor, has me ready to help wherever I can with MY testimony. You can help with yours, too! And if we can help others with our own experiences, perhaps it wasn't for nothing. Perhaps we can begin healing together?
I'm down to try.
Lord, please align my heart with your purpose and plan for me today. Today is all we have. I surrender today and tomorrow to you, our heavenly Father. Remove every voice inside my head that does not belong to you and make this path clear so that others may see it. In Jesus name I pray, amen.
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What The Faith?! But why?
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