16h (edited) • 🤭 Honesty Time (wins+lessons)
I’ve been battling overwhelm lately
like, bad. (How I’m supporting myself toward the end!)
The farm is steadily gaining new customers.
The work load is steadily growing too.
I’ve got 4 kids from ages 10 to 2 who all need me and are at such different milestones of development… it’s whiplash going from conversations about Jesus, sin, the evil world, emotional stewardship, and teaching division to wiping a butt of one of the little kids all within 20 minutes 🥲 and just repeating that cycle multiple times a day! Lol
Constantly pouring myself out, seeking to give them the best version of myself currently feels like a sprint on a hamster wheel.
We are really limited on water here in Colorado this year and it’s taking a toll on everyone who’s trying to earn their living from the land.
It’s so hot, we invested a lot of money in seed for our fields where our cows graze, and watching the seeds struggle in the hot sun because it’s “not our turn for the irrigation water until tomorrow” is a constant, gnawing stress.
The grass is the food for the cows. And it’s not like hay is a reliable backup, because all the farmers trying grow hay to sell ALSO have minimal water.
So what hay they do cut, is supposed to be double or even triple the normal costs.
My husband is a first responder. His job is demanding and a strain on us all. He’s really burnt out and wishes he could be with us more. But what choice is there right now? It’s our only income.
I’m coming face to face with my time management weaknesses.
I also broke my toe last weekend so I haven’t really been able to exercise.
It just feels like a lot right now.
Here’s how I’m supporting myself and taking it one day at a time though, because my birthright is to be an overcomer, and I refuse to let victim mentality poison my days.
-I’m remembering that perfectionism leads to mental/emotional paralysis in myself, so I am just STAYING IN MOTION.
It’s all gotta get done, and I don’t really care how. I’m just eating the elephant one bite at a time.
Imperfect progress is always better than perfect procrastination.
-I’m doing a lot of body-based, somatic regulation exercises. The physiologic sigh is my go to these days.
-I’m letting emotion OUT of my body. I’m crying when it wells up, I’m breathing a BIG sigh when I feel angry.
Discharging emotion is real, and it’s a gift from God.
And I’m being honest with my family when they hear/see me do these things.
“I’m alright babe, just feeling overwhelmed”
“Mom’s ok buddy, I’m just feeling irritated so I’m giving myself a sec to let it out”
-I’m taking moments of silence when they come.
A pause to sit down in the grass and just look at the clouds.
A hug for one of my little ones when they try to dart by.
A deep, “hmmmmm” to my favorite melody as I walk to feed the pigs. (Not a podcast in my ears)
That action stimulates your vagus nerve and chills you out really well btw!
Pro tip: “Misty Mountains” from the Hobbit soundtrack is a deep, humming MASTERPIECE.
Your vagus nerve will thank you for that!
Pain is inevitable in this life. Suffering is optional.
Christ said in this world, we’d have trouble.
That doesn’t just magically miss us because we’re “just moms”.
But He also said this. To take heart. Because He overcame this world ❤️
Everything needed will be provided.
Anyone else feeling this season of overwhelm lately? I’ve got a few really close friends who are battling immense stuff right now too.
Yes, it’s a lot right now! 🫣
Actually I’m in a peaceful season☀️
Somewhere in between those two 🙃
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I’ve been battling overwhelm lately
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