So pleased you’re here.
It’s a given that most people who join any type of psychology community aren’t new to self-development. Let’s face it, you’ve probably found yourself drawn to the self help shelves in your local book 📚 shop, and undoubtedly have a bedside table collapsing under the weight of all the books you’ve bought. You may have found yourself listening to an array of psychology podcasts 🎧whilst you commute to work or go for your daily walk, or scrolling self help reels on your socials 🤳when you’re waiting for your coffee ☕️ order. But there’s still this question that buzzes around your brain when issues crop up:
“If I know all this stuff….why do I find myself repeating the same old patterns?”
And that is exactly what we are going to address here.
So before we start here’s some background. This community arose from many years of my own clinical work where I kept seeing the same patterns: clients being aware of why they behaved a certain way but finding themselves unable to change their patterns of behaviour.
For instance clients…
🌱 feeling guilty when they set boundaries then finding themselves over-explaining the boundary and eventually dimming their voice again.
🌱 feeling responsible for other people’s emotions and scrambling to help them at the expense of their own health and mental wellbeing.
🌱 realising that throughout their lives they have been drawn to magnetic personalities even when they knew it would destabilise them; and guess what, it did.
🌱 finding themselves ending up as “the capable one” in every relationship and having their own needs pushed to the back burner.
These clients weren’t lacking awareness of why they kept doing this, they were lacking a map 🗺️ on how to stop and how to change these painful patterns for good.
And this is what this community is all about. Here, you will learn not only the psychological mechanisms behind your behaviour but more importantly you’ll learn how to change those behaviours for good. And you know what, because that change will be alignment with who you really are, not how you were made to feel, that change will be innate and eventually effortless and edifying.
So here’s your first step 👟on our journey together and it’s a really important one:
Can you introduce yourself below and answer this one question ❓
Where in your life do you feel you over-function the most? (work, relationships, family, friendships, parenting, or emotionally)
Remember you don’t need to share anything you’re uncomfortable with. A sentence is enough.
This will help me tailor the lessons and it may bring you further insights into your own patterns.
And lastly, even though this may have been a very challenging time for you, and I expect there have been times when you’ve felt broken and lost hope that things will improve, just know that you’re not broken 💔 you’ve just been running according to a strategy your brain 🧠 learned a long time ago to keep you safe. And whilst it probably did a great job at that then, it’s not relevant to who you are now. So what we are going to do together is understand it and update it.
Take care
Elizabeth