My Breakthrough Story · New Earth Community

My Breakthrough Story

Before

I was living in London for two years and after working long hours, making good money but having no energy to enjoy daily life for being so exhausted all the time I decided to move and pursue a long lost dream to live in Ibiza, a magical island bathed with sun away from the grey days of my dear London. I moved to the white island in 2018 and had a blast, It was much more that what I was expecting. Ok the long hours working as a Chef were still there, but the views from the kitchen were now of a sapphire blue sea, the salary was great and the tips, insanely high. I was living the dream. After the end of the season, I had a decision to make, to go back to the winter in London or stay in Ibiza with no plans or promises at all. I just had the money of the season and didn’t know how long it would last. Winter in Ibiza can be harsh, the energy of the island totally flips, what once was vibrant and full of people and energy, now feel dormant and scarce. But the island played it part and with all its mystery and magic supported me through the winter, I had no job, no income, but. I got everything I needed to go through the winter, I got a beautiful house in the sea frontline, I was able to buy a car that I loved driving, I was enjoying and discovering the island and its myths and legends and getting acquainted with its guardian Goddess Tanit. I had food and friends on my table. There an then I felt in my body that the abundance of my life was composed of all not only the money, but it was also a liberation and the first lesson I downloaded on the island.

Crisis

My crisis came the day I asked myself: When do I feel the most myself? What am I thinking, saying, doing, when I feel that I am expressing my essence?

This question came in the year 2020, when we were in the lockdown, and after a breakdown coming back from the supermarket. After an encounter with a friend and this working lady clapping and saying, “Don’t stop, keep buying”, so we would not approach each other to hug and say hello, and we just didn’t because of what she did. That made me feel like I was in the 1984 George’s novel.

When I got back home, I had a breakdown and cried and heard the voice of the Spirit saying within me: Go to the sun and meditate, breathe, feel yourself here, your presence, all is within you, you are fine. And then I turned that horrible lockdown moment into a moment of self-discovery, self-connection.

I started studying (yoga philosophy, meditation, I discovered the sovereign movement, and the anarchic manifesto). It all brought me to the question above. After answering that, my transformation began, and I could only think of sharing with the world through my work.

I wanted now to be a holistic therapist, a sacred space holder. I wanted to help people to meet with themselves and find within that they are the creatures and the creators of life.

At that moment, I looked at my work as a chef as nonsense. I saw the industry as an entertainment industry, something that had been misled from its original function, which is to nurture the human being and the Earth, because a healthy human, a healthy food, starts with a healthy soil. But I didn’t want to be a chef anymore; I wanted to be a therapist.

So, I started studying marketing to develop a personal brand, and in the middle of it all, I found out that the kitchen and the food were the main stone to build my offer from. It is something that holds immense power of transformation and change; it is pure power, people’s power that must be reclaimed.

The day I realised that the system was maintaining us in chains as consumers, I did not want to be a chef anymore, and I wanted a new profession altogether.

Chase

To navigate this change I started taking a bunch of different courses in many areas of knowledge. I wanted to renew and update my knowledge in marketing, learn branding, content creation to help me format a personal brand from the outside in. And was learning naturopathy, yoga philosophy, tantra philosophy, kundalini yoga, access bars, basically everything I could learn and extend, I love learning, but I was getting lost in so much knowledge. It was bringing me int paralysis when it came into being a new professional, I was a student. All this meanwhile I still had to keep working as a full-time chef to make money and pay the bills. The courage to keep going came from all the synchronicities that appear on my path, seeing the message I felt in heart repeatedly everywhere I was talking to people, the feeling in my heart that I must be doing something to expand the consciousness in the world. My husband saw it all happening, what I was living and supported me, always saying he saw that message in me for the way I lived.

Conflict

The hardest moment I encountered was finding myself in a deep confusion, my life was not making sense to me anymore. I wanted something new, to be somebody new, but so much information was bringing me a lack of clarity. The fear that I was going crazy and having a hard time to keep life going. The conversations with so friends were just not filling my soul, I was having trouble to find joy at work and felt inadequate to be there. I just wanted to be doing the inner work and trying to find my message and my voice with clarity. Pushing through I found out I have a hard time in doing so.

Keep self-disciplined, it’s always easier when I have a commitment to something exterior or somebody else. At the same time, I was facing my own power and was still sacred to step into it. The biggest strength I discovered in me was how resilient I can be in keep going even without knowing where the way is heading but in total surrender and trust.

Investing a lot of money in learning new skills and the time invested, and still not being able to produce anything with a true meaning for myself or of value to offer as a product or service brought me to a standstill and really made me question if it was all a dream in my kind or was really a higher call to step in my own power a be my authentic self in this world. I was in doubt, in fear and with no financial resources. But the fire burning in my soul to keep going did not let me abandon my cause.

Breakthrough

I felt that in this new path that was revealing itself to me I was trying to escape a few steps and be a person that I was still not. I was neglecting the journey to become this new me by not accepting who I already was and all that I already had. I did not want to be a Chef or work with food anymore; I wanted to be this new version of myself that was holding sacred spaces and was a healer and a beam of consciousness illuminating others. I wanted to be in the scenario and perform the show. That´s when I realised the ego trip happening there and then. And it was a blessing, for it gave me the opportunity to sit with myself and really look into the soul, digging my own shadows searching for my tru inner light. I was getting back to the initial question that had brought me here: When do I feel the most myself? What am I thinking, saying, doing, when I feel that I am expressing my essence?

That’s when the remembrance happened, I was doing it to embrace my true self and to share it from that place of truth and honesty. That when being a Chef and working with food made sense, not because I wanted to share recipes or teach people how to cook, but because I wanted to bring remembrance that true enlightenment and connecting with our own power of creating passes through us reconnecting with our inner temple and the Earthe itself, and that real food is a tool of power in that remembrance movement.

In that moment, something I was neglecting, my knowledge and relationship with food and its real meaning reveal itself as the corner stone of the message I was looking for inside of me. After that I started slowly to have more clarity and put some content out there. I still find myself in the moment of understanding how to structure it in a tangible way to share with people but now I feel I am on my own track.

After

The biggest transformation I have experienced along this journey was accepting that I do have something necessary to share. Something that may serve others on their own path to connecting with their own power. Today I am still making this career transition happen. I feel now this movement is coming from a place of integrity within myself and a burning desire to bring my true voice into the real world. The lack of clarity started to dissolve, and I am finding myself more confident.

I feel that all this outer search brought me back to myself and I have discovered and connected what is important and what I truly value and seek to embody in my life. I took me out of a automatic mode of being in the world and really made me question everything that involves my existence and how I interact and play a part in this world. Realising I am a sovereign being brought me also the realisation of the responsibility I have when I interact and bring something into this world.

My service has been shaped in a way that I cannot keep just cooking food for rich people and serving empty calories, I must bring consciousness to the table and embody a service of helping humanity remember that the healthy and potential of our being starts with the soil and the earth that support and nurtures us.

If you are feeling inadequate and lost on your path, don’t fall into despair, that’s the Great Spirit showing you there is another path for your Being.

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