Today there is a step to take, but you really aren't sure what it is. You may be thinking that this step is massive, but it really isn't. This is small step to make a small improvement that you then build on day by day. You need to see wins to keep the motivation for yourself. Just take that step today that makes 1% improvement, and tomorrow add another small step for another 1% improvement, and so on and so on.
In addition, you have placed yourself where you need to be. Now it may not seem that way. You may think that you're at the mercy of something, but you really aren't. You have placed yourself exactly where you need to be. From this point forward from that alignment, move forward.
And for those squishy squishy emotions, never doubt that there is love here. They may be having trouble moving some aspect of your relationship forward, but it isn't because they don't love you. It's more likely due to fear of doing something too fast or imbalanced. This too will rebalance.