We've been talking about being FOREVER PARENTS. Well, what do you think about this? My daughter called me and told me she got a visit from CPS because a lady she used to use for in-home day care just reported her for neglect - Said she only fed her baby applesauce when she was three months old.
At three or four months old, I remember her getting mixed food and trying to give it to her in between bottle feedings so she wouldn't be so hungry all the time. My daughter tried calling the woman several times over the summer to set up daycare for when school started, but she never returned her calls or texts. The CPS worker examined the children and looked at the home and said she felt it was a bogus call; they got them all the time.
My daughter wanted to know how I felt when she told me about it. I am dealing with my own health issues now and really couldn't do anything, whereas earlier in life I would have stuck my foot in and found out what was going on and used my influence to control the situation.
I froze. How do I 'feel'? I couldn't begin to say how I felt. I was angry, sad, afraid, powerless, all of them! Was I a FOREVER PARENT (grandparent) or a parent? In that moment, I just didn't know. I'm sure my daughter wanted a big reaction, but I had none. I was shocked. If these children were neglected, wouldn't I have noticed? Why would a day care owner wait months to report it? Of course, the case was closed, and the worker told my daughter that we are all just a call away from this kind of thing happening. As grandparents, what do we do? How do we, or should we, feel? As FOREVER PARENTS, we can't forget that we are still parents too. I could have interrogated her as to why such an accusation occurred; I could have cried and gone hysterical because what would people think? Or I could just be there and let her know that she is not alone. We all know different; our village is big, and we will support her through this.
Well, it didn't last long, so we didn't have to gather the troops, but it was a very trying time for my daughter and her FOREVER PARENT.
How would you handle this situation?