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Nov 2 • Not all who wander are lost🏞️
🌟 Comfort is Beautiful... Until It Becomes a Cage
Just started reading book " An Arsenal of Gratitude: Waging War on Mediocrity and Regret " and the first chapter got me thinking about comfort and discomfort and the things that I automatically take for granted by just being where I am in life... (shout out to this read already! If you haven't had an opportunity to chat with then you may not be aware that he has a gift for words--and I do NOT mean that he's chatty..I mean that his words are thoughtful and meaningful..his words do, in fact, improve upon silence.)
An additional shout out to who is currently doing the Steve challenge and what sounds to me like taking life to the limit and really stepping outside of his comfort zone!! This was also part of the inspiration!!
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Comfort is not the enemy. Safety, ease, routines, familiar people and habits all regulate the nervous system and help us recharge. We need some level of predictability and a sense of safety is something that is beneficial to our psyches and our bodies...
BUT!!! There is a quiet danger many of us do not notice: Comfort can slowly turn into complacency.
When comfort becomes the only place we operate from, our growth freezes. We stop stretching. We stop risking. We begin to shrink inside the walls that once felt like safety.
And when life eventually pushes us beyond those walls we feel overwhelmed, anxious, or helpless instead of capable and curious. (this reminds me of the frog that's sitting in a pot of water and the heat is slowly rising and the frog doesn't notice and then...it's cooked. I don't think that I want to be that frog...but am I? )
🧠 The Psychology Behind Comfort
The brain loves predictability. It sees the unknown as potential threat. The nervous system often interprets new experiences as danger even when they are not.
Important thing to remember: Growth requires activating the learning brain (prefrontal cortex) rather than only relying on the survival brain (amygdala). (this also ties in the difference beween post traumatic growth and post traumatic stress, but maybe we'll do something with this later)
Comfort activates safety. Challenge activates learning.Too much comfort can keep us in survival mode disguised as peace--isn't that interesting?? Comfort is disguised peace?
The sweet spot is controlled discomfort (though.....sometimes really challenging times really create opportunities for growth too, but we gotta know ourselves or get to know ourselves)
🌱 Why Stepping Outside Comfort Matters
When we gently stretch beyond what feels easy we build:
-Self trust
-Confidence
-Resilience and stress tolerance
-creativity and flexibility
-*****A wider nervous system capacity (expanding your window of tolerance)Each small step into the unfamiliar teaches your brain "I can handle more than I thought." I feel like this is such an important lesson in life....seriously! :)
(another side note....sometimes when we're so outside of our comfort zones, it makes us realize our dependencies on things and sometimes it can also lead to spiritual growth because we recognize our place in the universe a bit more...)
⚠️ Signs Comfort Has Turned Into Avoidance
These may be subtle:
-Repeating the same routines because change feels scary
- Dreaming big but never acting
-Feeling stuck yet telling yourself you are just being patient
-Declining opportunities out of fear you are not ready
-Mistaking numbness or low energy for peace
Comfort without growth becomes stagnation....and stagnant water leads to...decay, corruption, death...
🌿 Gentle Ways to Stretch Yourself
Growth does not HAVE to require intensity or self criticism. It can be gentle and paced with your nervous system.
Try:
-Starting a conversation with someone new
- Learning a new skill or hobby
-Taking a small risk like sharing your opinion
-Trying a new exercise, class, or environment
-Sitting with discomfort for a few breaths before retreating
-Taking imperfect action instead of waiting to feel ready
Aim for steps that feel challenging but doable--there's a sweet spot before things get too overwhelming.
This build self efficacy: the belief that we can influence our lives.
Therapist pondering:
Comfort is a resting place, not a permanent home. Growth asks for courage, curiosity, and compassion.
Questions to ponder:
What is one small stretch you can take this week?A tiny step counts. The brain changes with repetition, not force (what kind of neural connections do you want to reinforce?)
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🌟 Comfort is Beautiful... Until It Becomes a Cage
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