5d (edited) • General discussion
A Hidden Struggle of Mine
I was living life and I thought I was doing really well until those things started showing that there was a lot for me to learn.
I was divorced. And what that meant was that I had to take a real deep look at myself. But I wouldn't change that for anything because what came out of it were things that really hadn't hit me about life, my family, and myself as a leader.
What came up for me at the end of all of my reflections was that I wasn't doing things for Allah.
I thought I was, but I didn't really have a way to get any data to measure that intention and application of sacred knowledge.
In stories of the great shaykhs we often hear how when they reached a level of intellectual knowledge and even social status, they questioned their sincerity. That's a sign of sincerity, to question your sincerity.
There can be no real deep contemplation and true change if one doesn't take authentic inventory of the underlying intentions and purposes that one is doing things for.
So I went on a journey, and the first place I landed was in the arms of a shaykh who took me in and helped to support and guide me while I did the difficult work of personal transformation. That experience alone shifted my perspectives and renewed my commitment and how I would approach life from that point out.
Anyone ever had a struggle that made them shift?
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A Hidden Struggle of Mine
