27d • General discussion
Leadership and dogs with abandonment wounds
Some dogs aren’t “clingy.”
They’re scared.
There’s a difference.
I work with a lot of dogs who panic when their person leaves the room.
Follow them everywhere.
Struggle with separation.
Overreact to small changes.
Or seem constantly on alert, like they’re afraid something bad might happen.
But when you look a little deeper…
A lot of these dogs have experienced loss.
Rehoming.
Shelter stays.
Being left behind.
Big life changes they didn’t understand.
Or sometimes just a naturally sensitive nervous system.
To them, separation doesn’t feel inconvenient.
It feels unsafe.
Like, “What if you don’t come back?”
That’s not disobedience.
That’s fear.
And this is where leadership matters so much.
Not tough love.
Not forcing independence.
Not “cry it out.”
Steady, predictable safety.
Leadership for these dogs looks like:
calm routines
clear communication
gentle departures
consistent returns
showing them, over and over, “I always come back”
Because trust isn’t built with commands.
It’s built with experience.
When your dog truly believes you are safe and reliable, their body can finally relax.
They don’t have to monitor you every second.
They don’t have to panic.
They don’t have to hold everything together themselves.
They can rest.
And honestly… that’s the kind of leadership I think every dog deserves.
Not control.
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Leadership and dogs with abandonment wounds
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