Just did the first part of my Operating Manual and realized every app and course I ever bought started at the action level while the belief underneath never changed. That's why I always tap out. Also caught the phone by my bed for what it really is: a trap that wins before I'm even awake enough to fight it. I want to do more looking into the operating manual questions. Are they available still after today? I just finished the entire 5day challenge in 12 hours because I was determined to prove myself wrong that I can complete something. I did it. Read the first paragraph of my report and had to stop. Hitting hard already or I'm over tires and emotional. I hope all this work stays so I can come back and read it again.

So today was my day five, and it was a pretty auspicious day because this was the day I decided to commit to a six-week songwriting course. I would say my purpose is to express my authentic self as an artist, and that includes releasing and performing original music made to raise the frequency of the Earth. The Ikigai thing—I love it, but it’s not new to me. I’m a very passionate person. I didn’t decide to join this songwriting course until today, the day it started, because I already know how to write songs, just I havn't made any finished polished songs in years. Today did some more cleaning. I still didn’t do my specific open-loop task, but I went to the co-op to get some spices for cooking. While I was there, I ended up mentioning to a woman that I’ve hosted singing circles before. I like to host affirmation singing circles where we get everyone singing together, and they’re also improvisation workshops and jams. The people listening at the counter of the co-op were so interested. They said, “Oh, I would love to go to that.” One of the women kept asking me about my purpose and what I’m here to do.. One asked me more about my purpose, and I said that my purpose is everyone’s purpose, which is to be my most authentic self. For me, that includes performing, sharing, and expressing music and art to elevate consciousness. Including workshops, and just being as honest and expressive with my communication as I can. There was something so beautiful and healing about her genuine care and interest in what lights me up, she kept prompting me and asking about it, and when I started talking more about how I want to be well known not to make myself feel better than anyone else, but to spread a positive message of empowerment and freedom, I started crying because of how aligned I felt thinking about it and feeling it. And also because crying in that moment was totally raw and unapologetically expressed, so that is also part of my purpose. I made sure to not hold back, as expressing emotions is part of the rebellion against the repression of our expression. So that was lovely and unexpected. I just wanted to quickly buy spices and then get to my washing so I could finish this challenge.