@Christopher Paradox I am not denying my own perceptions are definitely scewed by my own experiences. So are yours and everyone else's. If you had not had gone through tough marriage in your life you would not reccomended men to not get married. How can you say that's not a biased advice? I did not realize the lady in the video was reflecting on herself in the video .. I took it as she was generalizing women behavior in sexless marriages. While some women might lack accountability, there are plenty who are willing to do the work but are unable to meet their husbands expectations anyways. I am happy she was able to in the end. If your wounds were healed would not you instead recommend men to get married. I don't know...

@Christopher Paradox Thank you so much for the message. I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to record it and send it to me. There is lots of wisdom in it. I am not denying I have lots of deep wounds. Not at all. Nor I am insisting on not seeing people's actions through the lense of those wounds. If my directness and honesty was perceived as an atrack please know that was not my intention, and I myself also am coming from a loving place here and from a place of lots of respect for you and the work you have done and are doing. I once dated a narcissistic man who was abused by his mother as a child. He projected his old wounds into our relationship a lot by doing exactly what you described in your voice message.. by reading into things that were not there. I studied a lot about projecting and gaslighting and all that stuff. That's when I also started studying Tolle. So I completely get it. So ok, would you please help me understand the message your post is trying to convey vs what I see it conveying? What I am seeing and hearing from your post and the video is this : " This man who impressed me on X a while ago, whose life story touched me deeply, this man who has very deep thinking process was once years ago very deeply hurt by a woman. Very deeply hurt. This man is trying to help couples avoid situations where women do not see how they could contribute to their marriage misery themselves. But then I read you saying "Men do not get married because women do not know how to take accountability for their behavior in a marriage." Then I watch the video of this woman looking back admitting her role in a disfunctiobsl marriage saying once she changed herself all problems fixed" So then I am confused trying to understand what the intended message is : is it "Men do not blame yourselves" or "Men do not get married? You will be better off?' Or, " Men blame yourself for staying too long. Women are unable to see their part?" As you can see the interpretations are endless and yes you are right we are often quick to judge through our on lense. If that's the case please help me understand the point you were trying to make and the advise associated with it as I was supposed to see if not had been triggered by my wounds. 😀 I genuinely am interested in finding out, if you care to help me, and seeing what I apparently am not seeing. And also understanding what I am seeing that is not there. So yeah I am definitely open to the possibility of me projecting my wounds onto the interpretation of your message.

Wow ! Tolle is an amateur 😀

I am going to challenge you Chris. Our subconscious mind projects. That's why it's very difficult to "just observe".