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I ended up getting close with two girls who’ve been friends for a couple of years , turns out they were both into me and open to sharing.

There’s no going back now—I’ve decided to leave college. With my parents still in Africa, it feels a little sneaky, which is why I wanted to wait for my dad to return. But I knew if I waited, I’d probably back out. So I’m moving forward. I’ve started looking for jobs, and I’m considering a service worker position on campus since I’m already part-time in food service. It pays about $13 an hour and would keep me busy while giving me chances to talk to people. Do you all have any suggestions for what else I could start doing?

I told my parents straight: I’ve realized college isn’t for me. I don’t know exactly what I can accomplish yet, but I want to see it through on my own, no matter what it takes. Obviously the backlash came—they told me I should think about it, then cut the call. The anxiety is there, heavy, but even with that, I want to see what I’m truly able to accomplish.

For anyone that has any issues because of porn (ED, low confidence, shattered expectations). This will probably resonate with you if you are typically one of the guys that had internet access at an extremely young age and spent a lot of time on it without adult supervision or if you are into evolutionary psychology. I think everyone who reads this will learn something. What inspired me to write this were some issues about 3 or 4 months ago. In the bedroom my "manhood" wasn't "manhooding." I did a good amount of research to see what the issue can be; I found it can be low testosterone, bad diet, anxiety, etc. So I thought maybe it could be anxiety and a bad diet; my diet was and is still not the best. It is not like I am eating shit foods every day, like McDonald's or something like that, but I for sure am not eating my fruits and veggies. So I started to take supplements that increased blood flow and had important nutrition, such as vitamin D, magnesium, etc. Did it work? Kind of. I saw and felt the benefits, but it was not a magic pill; there was still something blocking the stream. I also had friends who told me about how much they like sex, the positions they like, the pregnancy scares, etc. Now out of my friends, I would say I am definitely one of the more active and physically superior ones (even at a lighter weight), with a better diet compared to them or to the one person I have in mind at the very least. So I started to think the diet part wasn't fully sound (meaning valid). That is when I started to think if pornography was the issue. I wasn't sold on it at the start, mainly because of cope or something, but about a month ago I really started to look into it. Also, I tended to last longer whenever I didn't masturbate as frequently. I then got into the evolutionary psychology rabbit hole. I was finding out why I did it, and if you believe in the sperm wars theory, it is because of having more healthy sperm, infidelity, sperm competition, etc. I was challenging this, using ChatGPT, going back and forth with it to see what parts of the book are true or false. There are some things that Baker could've been wrong about or are not fully sound. In my opinion, if someone or something is claiming or trying to be true and you discover a hole, you better examine it because who is to say they are not wrong about something else? For your own self-interest and others.