Nov '23 • General discussion
do it anyway
Most people have something they hold on too that they feel offers them an identity of sorts.
Something they have been thru that they feel makes them who they are.
All the things that have happened to us. The bad have a tendency to out weigh the good for some reason.
Simply put it usually runs along these lines “I have lost something, some part of myself, been hurt, and that shapes me as a person”.
We will develop “coping mechanisms” for when it happens again.
A typical response to pain. ie.That’s burns because it is hot so I wont touch it.
Now this is a good an natural response for our existence in the world.
And yet I know that there are some on us who have relished the idea of being punched in the face. I being tied up in a knot. Or pushing ourselves in some kind of trining until we puke.
We absolutely know that if we are sparring we will get popped in the mouth.
We like it so much we PAY for the opportunity to get better at it.
Why don’t we do that with affairs of the heart?
It is true that right up there with a toothache is the pain of broken heart.
Both are as terrifying as the remedy.
Sitting in a dentists chair getting root canal or getting pulled and it aint never numb enough.
It seems when we lose someone we can’t numb that pain either. They may have passed on or they may have found someone new.
And we are left, sitting there, alone.
Everyone now knows that we were not good enough for whatever reason.
Ask someone who has been divorced for 10 or 20 years and you will see how long we carry such nonsense around.
Well, it is no wonder we protect ourselves. These kinds of things are ridiculously painful.
And yet the best part of life cannot be examined from inside the cell of our wall.
Everyone “knows” this but their best efforts are stymied by the remembrance of the bad times.
What do I become if I let go of this thing that has become a part of the definition of “me”.
It is something you can’t even imagine. I would submit to you that the best part of life is on the other side of that obstacle.
You will be exposed. Do it anyway.
Someone will hurt you again. Do it anyway
Never be afraid to stand up and try to love again. Do it anyway.
We could spend hours pointing out the flaws of todays men and women. Love them anyways.
Because in the effort to do so you will soon realize that you can love someone at arms length or you can wrap your arms around them.
Our ability to determine the validity of our ability to build a loving and happy relationship is directly proportionate to our ability to use the power of love properly with the rest of world.
Some people are hands down just a bad investment. But you will have a very hard time finding the right one if the best part of you is cowering in fear behind a wall you’ve made so you don’t get hurt again.
Fear is a conditioned response. Courage is a decision. That principle does not change simply because it is an affair of the heart.
If you can handle the physical punishment of the world, ice it down, rehabilitate the wound or the pain and keep going.
You can do the same thing when it comes to building those friendships that last. That withstand. That become what we refer too as our tribe.
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do it anyway
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